Ok, let's go into the back story to this so everyone can have a better understanding about the situation.

I met this guy on Myspace (Casper resident) and he asked me to be friends with him. I always check out peoples' profiles and whatnot to make sure they aren't trying to sell me anything or that they are not overly creepy. His profile seemed harmless so I figured 'what the hell' and added him. A couple of weeks after that I got a message out of the blue that says: "Hi there, I hope you are having a wonderful day."

My first thought: "Hmm...well that was nice of him. I should message him back." I tend to respond to people that are nice to me. It's a personality trait...or defect...it really depends on who you talk to about me....anyways...

So I messaged this person back and things esclated from there. I wound up getting his phone number and I bravely called it, (I say that cause I'm shy as hell and I have issues with things like this), and finally talked to him.

First off, his voice is is about 5 times higher than what a normal man's should be. Obviously this should have been my first sign to run like hell, but I generally do not judge people on silly crap like that. The last guy I dated talked like he always had something in his mouth, so simple things like that I've always overlooked. We talked and we set up an actual date to go to the movies.

The day of the date, actually about 15 minutes before he picked me up, I was sitting in front of my computer thinking to myself, 'wow...I met this guy on Myspace, this has disaster written all over it'. I usually don't think negatively like that, but this whole situation just seemed...weird...and my gut was telling me this was not going to work out. He knocks on my door and when I opened it, lo and behold my stomach was once again right.

Apparently I have found the shortest man in Natrona county without even trying. This guy HAS to be only like...5'0...MAYBE. I'm sorry, but I'm 5'2 and my basic dating requirement is that you HAVE to be taller than me. Like I said before, I'm 5'2...this should not be difficult and I obviously need to add this requirement to my Myspace profile.

Anyways, he squeaks and he's short. I swear I FAIL at dating...

We go to the movies and he's a perfect gentleman. He pays for everything, opens my doors, and is very polite and sweet. I'm not going to take away the good aspects of the date because that isn't right, and he did his absolute best to make a good first impression. I gave the entire situation a second thought and decided that maybe I was being a little too harsh about his looks aqnd that I should really give him a chance. So we set up another date.

The second date is when I realized that this was definately not going to work. We went out to eat and we discussed all sorts of things. First of all, I hate to say this but his abundance of friends really too much for me to handle. And I could already tell that most of them are really not his friends and that they use him. Of course I'm being polite and not saying my thoughts out loud...and if this were to ever become a serious relationship, I already knew that his 'friends' would be an issue. Let me digress for a moment here and say that if I'm seriously seeing anyone, I don't care who you hang out with as long as they are not using you. That would drive me up a fucking wall.

Anyways, he starts in on saying how all his friends are protective over him and whatnot and that they'd come after anyone that hurts him and blah, blah, blah. This is where I raised my eyebrow and went 'WTF? O_o'. Apparently he has a posse of friends that may or may not lynch your ass at any given moment. Or at least that is the message that he was trying to convey.

My thoughts: 'So let me get this straight, if I emotionally hurt you...your little gang of friends are gonna come hunt me down eh? Wait, let me give you my complete home address and my work address for your friends. I'll tell Andypants that we might have some visitors.'

Am I scared? No. Intimidated? Fuck no... At this point I knew this shit was not going to work, but I politely let him finish his meal and we left. (And for the record I hate Village Inn because every damn time I eat there I get sick.)

So I took him on the LAST date, which I knew would suck horribly because I was going to be the one giving him bad news. I just really hoped the worst wouldn't happen (him bursting into tears...I could totally see that happening), but I went ahead and I set everything up and took him to Outback Steakhouse. I paid for everything and was completely honest with him and how I felt. I did it as gently as possible and unless someone else could teach me to do this differently or give me some pointers, I think I handled it very well.

Since then we have kind of been good acquaintances. He used to regularly message me in the mornings with a "Good Morning!" text. and I would reply back. I'd also talk to him over the phone once a week and be sociable.

Fast forward to yesterday evening....

Here lately he hasn't been texting as much and I REALLY suck at communication through the phone so I haven't been all that worried about it.

I finally checked my Myspace account yesterday and saw that he had thrown up a bulletin for his a blog. In the past he was always asking if I read his stuff, basically pimping his mad blogging skillz. I figured I'd click on over to his profile and check up on him.

His post was about his life and the difficulties and obstacles  in it, which I'm sure everyone has. But what disturbed me the most was how I was used as his 'starting point' for all of his troubles. He didn't use my name, but I was referred to as 'her'. He hasn't dated anyone else since me, and the last girl he dated is constantly referred to as 'the psycho bitch', so I know he's talking about me. I normally wouldn't care less, but for some reason it's bothering me.

How is it that I've kicked off his streak of personal fuckups? He had his car repoed two weeks ago because he fell two months behind on his vehicle payment, and he's been forced to ride his bike to work. I've offered before to give him a ride home and he declined, so it's not like I'm not trying to be helpful. But I believe that it's not my damn fault for his own personal mishandling of his own finances. The way that the blog was setup was that ever since he dated me, the things in his life have gone to shit. He wasn't paying his fucking vehicle payment BEFORE I dated him. So what the fuck is up with that? And to add to that, during one of last month's conversations, he was in the middle of purchasing $128.00 worth of dvds. He said he was splurging on himself. I can completely understand the need to splurge on one's self, don't get me wrong, but $128.00 on movies...get fucking real...

If I wasn't at work I'd actually put up the blog link so that people could read it, but unfortunately I'm at work and our firewall won't let us have access to Myspace. But for some unknown reason, Facebook, LiveJournal, and Twitter are all acceptable...

Bleh...ok I'm done.  Maybe I'm the one in the wrong here...and if I am, well then I'll be more than happy to own up to it.

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters from Naruto...dammit...

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“Hatake-san, Umino-san,” Ayame bowed to both of her new patrons, “What can I get for you today?”

“One bowl of beef ramen for me,” Iruka said as he looked to Kakashi to get the other ninja’s ramen preference. Kakashi looked thoughtful for a moment, “Hmm good choice, I believe I’ll have the same.”

“A bottle of sake too if you could Ayame-chan,” Iruka added. Ayame nodded and went to go retrieve the small bottle of alcohol. Kakashi turned to give Iruka a look of surprise, which just basically consisted of an eyebrow raise, but Iruka still caught his expression. He felt suddenly flustered for some reason and made an attempt to hide it by rubbing his scar. He gave Kakashi a weak smile, “Ahh well umm…it’s been a long day. I need to loosen up a little.”

“I just never took you for someone who would drink during the school week.” As soon as Kakshi said those words he mentally winced. Could I be any more of an ass? Remember your manners for Kami’s sake… “I apologize, that was rude of me to make assumptions about you.” Kakashi said as he steadied himself on his stool without putting too much pressure on his left butt cheek. I really wish this would heal just a little faster…

“Ahh, it’s ok. Many people think that way about me. Just because I’m a school teacher doesn’t necessarily mean I’m a straight-laced, stuffy teacher.” Iruka said as he took up his seat next to Kakashi’s. “Teaching children isn’t easy, and sometimes it’s just good to relax a little after a hard day of trying to keep the kid’s attention spans focused on you for more than ten minutes at a time.”

“I can definitely agree with you there,” Kakashi said, “I will admit, this teaching thing is much harder than it looks. I’ll even go further and admit that I never really gave the job of teaching much of a second thought. I never took any of it seriously. You know the saying…’Those who can… do…those who can’t…teach’.”

Iruka frowned at Kakashi’s words. He knew that old saying, and he never agreed with it. “Yes…yes I’ve heard of it.” He looked up and saw Ayame pouring two cups of sake for them. He hoped that her presence at the table would make Kakashi drop the subject and move on to something else.

Unfortunately, Kakashi couldn’t read Iruka’s mind and he continued on. “Yes well, whatever fool came up with that has obviously never taught.” Kakashi nodded to waitress in thanks. “Ahh …thank you Ayame-san.”

“You are welcome Hatake-san and your food will be out shortly.” Ayame said as she turned to walk back towards the kitchen. The thought to thank Ayame for bringing out the sake never crossed Iruka’s mind. He was too busy sitting there in shock of Kakashi’s last words. “Excuse me?” he questioned.

“What?” Kakashi gave Iruka a puzzled look. “My apologies if I said something out of line…”

“No no, you didn’t.” Iruka frowned at his sake glass and decided that he would much rather see it empty. He swallowed the liquid and continued. “I just find it hard to believe that you have a change of heart after only one day of being in the classroom with them.”

“Well, believe it. Kids think adults are intimidating when it really is the other way around. And as for that saying…it’s basically a blatant lie. The people that ‘teach’ obviously can ‘do’ because if they can’t, they cannot ‘teach’ whatever it is that they know how to ‘do’ to begin with,” Kakashi said, “People that teach have the gifts of being patient and being able to communicate in a manner that enables others to learn.”

Iruka blinked in disbelief. “Do you really believe that?”

Kakashi sighed and shook his head. “Iruka, I know damn good and well those kids hardly listened to a word I said today. Hell, look at me,” he began to chuckle lightly, “I’m covered in spit wads and I have eraser chunks in my hair. I got owned by a bunch a 6 and 7 year olds because I assumed that teaching pre-genin was easy, and I deserved every bit of torture those kids put me through.” Kakashi stopped chuckling long enough to let out another sigh. “It’s just too bad that I didn’t get anything accomplished with them today. Although I did find out which ones were the troublemakers.”

Iruka sat there and let Kakashi’s words sink in. I can’t believe that he’s admitting that the kids are kicking his butt. I figured that he’d be brushing off all of these incidents to save his ego. The feeling of guilt came back to haunt him. Great, I’ve really screwed up this time…He’s nothing like I thought he was. I’m not going to be able to sleep at night now…jeez. I suppose I really should help him with his classes, or maybe help him make friends with the kids or something. “So which kids are going to be problematic?”

“Well,” Kakashi started, “I think the whole class likes a good prank, but I think I should concentrate on Diago.” Kakashi said. “He may not be the solid ringleader of the entire class, but the boy definitely has skills in the pranking department. Don’t get me wrong, if they actually pull off a decent prank on me, I don’t think I would mind. That would certainly help to keep me on my toes. However, I don’t agree with how Diago is going about it. It’s obvious that people can become injured by his pranks, which makes this a problem.”

“Diago? As in Kochi Diago? Hmm…that’s interesting.” Iruka said as Ayame set down their bowls of ramen. “Thank you Ayame-san.”

“Let me know if you need anything else Umino-san, Hatake-san. Enjoy your meal.” She said as she gave a polite bow and walked away.

“We will and thank you again.” Kakashi added as she continued back towards the kitchen. He turned to Iruka as he broke apart his chopsticks. “How is Diago’s behavior interesting? Were you expecting me to say someone different?”

“Well, if that is the child that you think that’s the most troublesome, then you may have another issue on your hands.” Iruka said around his mouthful of ramen. He heard the clinking noise of chopsticks hitting an empty bowl and turned just in time to see Kakashi adjusting his mask over his nose. Whoa…Naruto wasn’t exaggerating on how fast Kakashi eats…. “Erm...are you done? Or do you want another bowl?”

“I’m good for now, I need to let my stomach settle for a few moments.” Kakashi said as he poured himself another drink. “More sake Iruka?”

“Yes please.” Iruka smiled as Kakashi poured him another cup. “Are you always this hospitable towards people that you take out to dinner?”

“Well, considering my dinner guests used to consist of three hormone-induced teenagers, I’ve found that I would rather spend the evening having an adult conversation with another adult, rather than have to break up various arguments and would-be fist fights.” Kakashi replied. “Unfortunately I just hardly ever get to do it that often. Being an active ninja on the roster doesn’t give me very much time to hang out with others.” He rubbed the back of his sheepishly, “This mission…erm…teaching position… would almost be somewhat of a vacation…well I mean… that is if I weren’t teaching…maa…it’s hard to explain…”

“No I get it.” Iruka swallowed another wad of noodles. “I work the mission room and I know how hard the Hokage works everyone. I’ve also heard a little bit about when you became a chunnin and a jounin. You were very young were you not?”

“Yes, according to the elders and the Hokage I was labeled a genius back then. Therefore, I was needed out in the field more than in the village.” Kakashi swished his sake around in his cup and propped his chin up on his elbow. “Not much of a life, neh?”

Iruka just stared into his bowl of ramen. Being forced to go kill at a young age, not having hardly any human contact other than to kill…that is a lot of stress for an adult. To think that he was doing it as a child…A thought flashed through Iruka’s mind. “But you had team seven. You had time to spend in the village then.”

“Yes, but I don’t train in the village. Especially with Naruto and Sasuke sparring. People would have thought that they were trying to kill one another, and then I would have had all sorts of trouble. It’s much easier and peaceful to train outside the main gates. ” Kakashi reasoned. “That way I had the freedom to train in the areas that they were lacking in.” Even though I couldn’t train them in what they needed the most…

“That makes sense. I can understand not having the freedom to train, or teach in my case, in the way I know my students need it.” Iruka said before he finished off his bowl of ramen, “There have been times other teachers and I have had to go before the Hokage and the elders with new curriculum ideas for the students. Sometimes we get our way and other times we don’t. It’s frustrating to know that the information you want to pass on may help save a life someday, and the council members fail to see the reasoning behind it.”

“Yes, yes it is. Although it is hard for me to see Tsunade turning down ideas from the Academy teachers.” Kakashi said as he shook the bottle of sake to gauge the amount left inside.

“Well, it’s mostly the elders who have issues with what we teach the children.” Iruka snorted into his sake cup. “Those stuffy, old geezers are a pain in the ass sometimes.”

Kakashi broke out into a deep laugh. “Iruka-sensei! I can’t believe you’re speaking about the village elders that way!” Kakashi cried out in a mocking voice and held his hands up to his face. “What would your students say about that?”

Iruka shook his head and laughed with him. “I think I could go to them to find more colorful words to call the elders. The kids can be quite horrible at times.” Iruka let his laughter die out due to his stomach making noises. “Wow, I must still be hungry…”

Kakashi snickered and hollered for Ayame. “Ayame-san! May we get a couple more bowls of ramen and some tea?”

Ayame stuck her head around the corner. “Of course Hatake-san! It will be right out.”

“I hope you don’t mind tea Iruka, I don’t think it would be a very good idea for us to go to school tomorrow with hangovers.” Kakashi said as he drained the last of the sake into Iruka’s cup.

“No I don’t mind, and thank you for dinner Kakashi.” Iruka said before finishing his drink and moving the now empty cup and bowl over to the side. “You didn’t have to go to all this trouble.”

“This is no trouble at all Iruka, and I’m the one who should be thanking you. You had to participate in one of the most senseless challenges Gai has come up with so far,” Kakashi replied.

“It wasn’t so bad, although you do have some interesting scars.” Iruka said as Ayame came out with their ramen and their tea. “I bet there are some interesting stories behind some of them.”

“There are a few stories that are interesting. I’ve even gotten a few of them from the challenges Gai and I do.” Kakashi said as he picked back up his chopsticks. “Our taijutsu fights can get rather violent. Especially when Gai forgets to trim his toenails and I’m on the receiving end of a open-toed, ‘youthful’, roundhouse kick.”

Iruka almost snorted his noodles out of his nose from laughter. “You’re kidding?!” He gasped out after a few moments.

Kakashi’s eye turned upwards and Iruka could almost see him grinning under his mask. “Nope. His toenails could rival a bear’s if he doesn’t keep them trimmed.”

Iruka started laughing again and began to hold his sides from his ribs aching. He was laughing so hard that he didn’t notice that Kakashi had already finished his second bowl of ramen and was flagging down Ayame once more for some more tea. Iruka finally composed himself to sit up and start working on his second bowl. Both men sat there in a comfortable silence for quite some time before Iruka spoke again. “Taki-sensei is his father.”

“Huh?”

“Diago. The teacher you replaced was his father, Taki.”

Kakashi blinked and gave Iruka a long look. “Diago’s father was the original teacher? I thought it was unconventional to have your own child as a student? ”

“Well it is. But with our forces cut back due to Sound and Sand’s attack on the village, there is a shortage of teachers because we chunnins are also doing missions as well. With not as many teachers to go around, we have had to consolidate some of the classes.” Iruka explained. “The situation with Taki-san and his son had to be overlooked because of this.”

“Shit…” Kakashi murmured.

“Like I said, I think you may have a different type of situation on your hands if Diago is the problem.” Iruka said while nibbling on a piece of beef. “His father has been out on a mission since a couple of months ago. No one has heard anything about him coming back, so there is no news of where he is actually at, more especially since his mission is classified. The class has had numerous substitutes trying to fill in the position, but they all quit after about a week. Sometimes they don’t even last that long.”

Kakashi just sat there staring at his empty bowl. Now I get it. Diago doesn’t want anyone taking his father’s place. It makes Taki dead in a sense. Maa…now this really sucks. Kakashi mentally groaned. I have an angsty prankster on my hands…like a combination of Naruto and Sasuke. Apparently I’m overdue for an enormous backlash of karma from the way this is turning out. He brought his head up and shot a sidelong glance at Iruka finishing up his ramen. He knew. Why didn’t he tell me? “Um… Iruka?”

Kakashi’s questioning was interrupted by two jounin standing at the entrance of the ramen stand. The taller shinobi with the cigarette hanging out of his mouth was calling Kakashi’s name.“Kakashi!” Asuma barked out, “There you are! We’ve been all over the village looking for you! By the way, I heard you won Gai’s challenge, counting scars….that’s a new one… Hey Iruka! Good to see you too! Wow! You guys look like shit!” Both teachers frowned at the last comment and Iruka tried to hide his bandaged hand.

“Asuma! It’s not polite to shout like that.” Kurenai scolded. She turned to look at both men. “Kakashi, Iruka, how are you two this evening? You two do look a little worse for wear. Kakashi…are those dried up spitwads? And what happened to your hand Iruka?”

Kakashi snorted, “Teaching pre-genin should be a continuous A-rank mission. Too bad that it isn’t or Iruka here would be making fortune.”

Iruka chuckled at Kakashi’s statement. “We’re good Kurenai; my hand is fine, just a bit sore. How are you and Asuma doing?”

“Doing fine.” Kurenai replied. “Actually, I kind of had a question for Kakashi…”

“Do I need to leave? I don’t want to impose.” Iruka said pushing himself off of his stool.

Asuma held his hands up. “No! You are more than welcome to stay. Actually you need to hear some of this anyways.”

“Erm…ok…is everything alright?” Iruka asked sitting back down in his chair.

“Everything is great actually. Really, really great…” Kurenai hesitated for a moment before continuing on. “Um, you guys are aware of mine and Asuma’s…erm…” She made a small gesture back and forth between Asuma and herself.

“Personal relationship?” Kakashi offered with a hint of a smirk in his voice.

Kurenai blushed in response. “Ahh yes. You know we have been staying discreet when in public seeing how regular citizens frown upon shinobi relationships.”

“Of course, and I think the shinobi community has done a nice job on keeping personal relationships under wraps. I also think it’s silly that the regular citizens look down on us having a life outside of protecting the village. But that’s my personal thoughts…” Iruka said. “It’s a shame really…”

Kakashi nodded his head in agreement. “It is indeed.” He turned his attention to the jounin couple in front of him. “So I’m assuming you are coming to us to tell us some new news about your relationship?”

Asuma nodded. “Yes well, we’re um…we’re getting married. And we would love for the both of you to be there in support for our marriage. This whole this is going to be a small affair, but I’m assuming the reception party might be somewhat large. There are only shinobi that are going to be present, and the public is not going to be aware of it as well.”

“Of course Asuma! I’m honored that you’ve asked.” Iruka gave him a huge smile.

“Maa… I’ll be there as well. Thank you for the invitation.” Kakashi’s eye turned upward to match his hidden smile.

“Well, um Kakashi, I had something separate to ask of you. As you already know…my father has been dead for years now, and I don’t have anyone to escort me down the aisle….and I was wondering …wondering if…” Kurenai voice trailed off and she looked to Asuma for help.

“She was wondering if you would walk her down the aisle Kakashi.” Asuma finished for her. “I told her that I didn’t think that you would mind. Since you’re in the village due to your new teaching position and not leaving for awhile, I didn’t think that you would mind doing this for us.”

“I wouldn’t mind doing it for you regardless if I was in the village or not. I’d be more than happy to do it.” Kakashi said grinning like a loon.

“Great!” Asuma said with excitement. “Kurenai and I really appreciate you doing this Kakashi. It means a lot to us.”

“Yes it does. Thank you so much.” Kurenai added. “Don’t worry the reception will be well worth you doing this for us…if you know what I mean.”

“Ooo…lots of alcohol perhaps?” Iruka asked.

“Maybe a little.” She replied with a mischievous grin. “Anyways, we’re going to do this next weekend, so you’re getting a week and a half notice. Iruka, if you’d like, Anko needs some help with decorations in both the temple and reception area, if you’re interested.”

The thoughts of Anko possibly molesting him during the wedding setup ran through Iruka’s brain. He tried not to shudder at the thought and was attempting to try to make up an excuse not to help when Kurenai added, “We really need all the help we can get. We know you’re responsible and we know you’d do a good job at handling how our wedding decorations would look…”

Kakashi had seen the flash of emotions crawling over Iruka’s face at the mention of Anko’s name. He was trying hard not to stare at the chunnin trying to make up his mind but he couldn’t seem to tear his gaze away from his face. Worse comes to worse…act sneaky when staring. It was almost comical, but Kakashi did his best not to break shinobi rule #64: ‘Thou shall not bust up laughing when making attempts to act stealthy’. Between Iruka’s eyes getting wide and his mouth moving up and down, his look of ‘a clueless goldfish’ was rather impressive.

Gah…not Anko…anything but Anko…damn you KurenaiWHY do you have to look so…so…so pouty… “Erm…I suppose I could help…” Iruka said hesitantly.

Kunerai gave him a relieved smile. “You’re awesome Iruka. Now, the wedding is at 10 a.m., but the rehearsal starts at 8.”

“What type of wedding are you two having?” Iruka asked. “A traditional wedding doesn’t seem to be too discreet.”

“We’re going have the wedding done in the western style, without the three wardrobe changes, endless amounts of incense, and the obscene amount of vows and praying. That’s going to attract too much attention if we want to keep this as tactful as possible.” Kurenai explained. “Tsunade suggested that a western-style wedding would be best.”

She then turned and gave a pointed look at Kakashi. “Please try to be on time, I know it’s killing your reputation right now for you to have to show up to school on time as it is, but this is the only wedding I’m going to have and I’d like for it to go smoothly.” Her look turned slightly darker and she added, “Besides Kakashi…I’d really HATE to have to use any jutsu at my own wedding…”

Kakashi quickly puts his hands in front of him, “No no…I’ll…I’ll be there…”

She glared at him just a little harder. Iruka swore if she stared any harder at him she could quite possibly make the Copy-nin’s hair spontaneously burst into flames just from the intensity of her eyes alone.

“On time…”Kakashi finished meekly.

“Good.” The dark look was replaced with a sunny disposition and a wave. “See you guys there!” With that she turned and walked out of the ramen stand with Asuma giving them a thumbs-up sign before following his fiancé.

“Western-style eh? What’s that like?” Kakashi asked as he turned around to finish his tea.

“Well, it’s much simpler than our traditional weddings we usually have. Some of the mechanics of it are kind of similar, but it’s basically like Kurenai said, no changing clothes, incense, or praying or singing. There are still some vows, but not as many. The receptions are somewhat the same, plenty of drinking and dancing.” Iruka said.

“Ahh, well, I won’t be dancing, but I’ll go along with the drinking.” Kakashi replied.

“Uh…you have to dance.” Iruka politely informed him.

“Who says?”

“You have to dance with Kurenai since you’re the one who’s giving her away. Asuma is supposed to step in sometime in the middle of you two dancing and take over. It’s part of the tradition.” Iruka explained.

Shit… Kakashi thought. Well this is going to be an issue…especially since I don’t know how to dance. “I wonder if Kurenai would be nice enough to let me skip that part.”

Iruka snorted into his cup of tea. “Ha! Were you not noticing how hard she was glaring at you just so you wouldn’t show up late? I think you’d be better off just sucking it up and dancing with her.”

“You may be right,” Kakashi conceded, “I really don’t want to be on the receiving end of one of her jutsus.”

Iruka turned to look at Kakashi. “What exactly was she talking about having to use jutsu at her wedding?”

“Well, as you know she is a genjutsu specialist. I’ve seen some of what she can do first-hand…needless to say it’s quite impressive…and scary…” Kakashi gave a small shudder. “I remember one time when Kurenai was out training her team out by where my team and I were training one morning. Apparently Kiba arrived late and she threw a genjutsu on him to teach him a lesson. We heard someone screaming so we ran over to where they were in the forest thinking that there was trouble. When we got there he was just huddled on the ground whimpering.” Iruka’s widened again in shock. “He wouldn’t tell anyone what he saw until later.” Kakashi gave a small chuckle. “I have it on good authority, per Naruto, that Kiba thought he was training Akamaru with his Dynamic Marking, but instead of the dog peeing on everything, it was actually Akamaru training Kiba how to do it…at the hot springs…on the female’s side…and apparently none of the girls were too happy about it…I think he might have been naked as well…”

Iruka just sat there and laughed. It was just too funny to comprehend. Where in the hell was that woman when I was teaching him?!?!I would have KILLED for a genjutsu like that back then, he thought. He looked up to find Kakashi laughing along with him. He couldn’t help but sit up and give Kakashi an honest smile. Wow…three days ago, if someone told me that I would be at the ramen stand with this man and actually be having a good time, I would have told them that they were absolutely crazy. We’ve been sitting here for awhile, eating, drinking, and having serious conversations. Hell, Kurenai even asked him to walk her down the aisle! That’s saying something, regardless if he’s being forced to stay in the village or not. I think I drew too many conclusions from Naruto’s stories to make an honest opinion about him…

“Maa, Iruka, it’s getting late. We should be heading home to get some sleep. Remember…we have class tomorrow.” Kakashi said as he stood up digging out his wallet for some bills.

“Ahh yes, of course.” Iruka stood up. “Thank you again for dinner.”

“No problem.” Kakashi said turning back around to look at Iruka. This was …this was fun…

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“I’m honored that you think that my services here could help your class as well.”

“I’d never hurt Iruka-sensei, nor any one of my students or my teammates.”

Iruka tossed from one side of the bed to the other. Kakashi’s words from the past couple of days were haunting him, making the guilt come to the surface and fester in Iruka’s mind.

“Maaaa, he’s not going anywhere with you.”

“You don’t seem to the type that would run around and purposely spread gossip, especially over some silly little weapons lesson.”

He flung a pillow and the kunai he kept underneath it across the room in frustration. Shit… He thought as he banged his head into his mattress. That’s my only pillow…

“Thank you for all your trouble Iruka-sensei.”

He growled as he sat up and glanced around the moonlit room. He finally spotted his abused pillow, not on the floor but pinned to the wall by his hidden kunai. Wonderful…I’ll have to go by Sato-san’s shop again. This makes this like the fourth time this month I’ve had to replace a pillow…hmmm I wonder if I can get it on credit… He looked at his alarm clock. 4:00 a.m. ….wonderful…just wonderful…

“I really appreciate it.”

“Gah!” Iruka flung the covers off of his body and proceeded to put some pants on. Cocoa…hot cocoa will make everything better, he thought to himself as he drug his tired body out of his bedroom and into his kitchen.

“Being a ninja does make you faster and stronger than others, but it doesn’t make you invincible.”

Must make cocoa faster. Iruka grumbled and glared at the water pot in front of him. Cocoa will make it all go away…

“Besides, I think you all have what it takes to become good ninja.”

Iruka sat down at the table, giving up on watching the water boil. He rolled his coffee cup between his hands trying to concentrate on something else. There really is only one way to make the guilt go away…

“Please…just call me Kakashi.”

No one should be there at this hour…at least that will make it easier…

“As you wish …Iruka…and thank you.”

Shit… Iruka got up from the table and went back to the bedroom. He yanked a shirt over his head and stomped back to the kitchen. He sighed as he took the water off of the burner. I have no right to be mad at anyone but myself. He knew there was only one way to effectively clear his conscience, well, clear it as much as he could without telling Kakashi how big of an asshole he really was. Mom…Dad…I’m coming for a visit.

He turned to go get his sandals but stopped when he saw his coffee cup sitting on the table. A small smile crossed his face as he went back into the kitchen, not before I get my cocoa though….

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Iruka’s silent footsteps through the trees made it easy to make his way to the memorial stone undetected. Feeling the early morning dew settling into his clothes, he sped along his trail of tree branches hoping to make it to the memorial in good time. He knew he’d do ok if he stayed away from anything or anyone that would slow him down. Occasionally there would be patrols out this way, and he hated having to run into them and explain what he was doing out here at such an early hour. He was pretty sure that the ANBU Black Ops didn’t really want to hear about how he had issues with guilt, shame, mistrust, anything else that would be considered a negative feeling. Plus when flustered, and being confronted by ANBU generally provokes the feelings of being uncomfortable, he had a bad habit of stuttering and rambling. In the end, he just decided that everything would be much easier if he’d work on his stealth skills when going to visit his parents.

I’m close, I can almost see the clearing…He thought as he leapt off of a higher branch down to a lower one, safely making his decent from the treetops. All of a sudden he felt something not quite right with the area and almost made himself plummet to the forest floor from his abrupt stop on the tree limb he was occupying. Chakra…it’s familiar…who in the hell is out here at such an early hour? He jumped down to the ground and crept his way towards the massive back stone in the middle of the clearing.

He couldn’t see anyone standing in front of it. Odd…did the person sense my presence and leave? Iruka closed his eyes and concentrated on the area’s terrain, sensing for any type of movement. No, someone is still here… He moved forward and froze when he heard a voice speak.

“You know Obito, I think I’m going to able to do this teaching thing. I think I finally made a friends well… well maybe not a friend per say…acquaintance…maybe…I don’t know really…but I did take him out for dinner this evening.” A pause. “Hey! I paid this time!” Another pause “No, it wasn’t with students, it was with an actual adult.”

Who in the hell is this person talking to? There was only one chakra signature… Iruka moved forward just a little bit more and stood on his tiptoes to see over the tall weeds that were growing close to the monument. From there, he saw the voice’s owner halfway laying in the grass and leaning back resting on his elbows for comfort. He could see the back of Kakashi’s head tilting to the side as he chattered away to the stone like it was his best friend. His voice however was different. It sounded younger, more innocent, like a young teen’s voice. Kakashi? What in the hell is he doing out here, and who is he talking to? As soon as he thought it, he felt incredibly stupid. You’re not the only person who has lost a friend or a loved one idiot…but, I don’t remember anyone named Obito…

“I also won Gai’s challenge. Scar counting this time.” Kakashi continued. “He said that it was ordained from Kami himself. You didn’t have a hand in that did you?” Pause. “You’re right, that’s more of something sensei would set up.” Pause. “I know I’m changing the subject. Why does it matter who I hung out with last night?” Another pause. “I was never good at making friends Obito, you know that. Hell, when you were alive we were never really that close. Teammates is all. Nothing special.” Another pause, and this time Iruka had to strain to hear Kakashi’s softly spoken words, “Listen, I know that having friends is normal. But if you haven’t noticed, I’m not what is even considered normal. I’m a shinobi remember? I’m not even normal under shinobi standards. So where does that leave me?” Pause. “No I’m not an emotional douchebox…I see Rin and sensei still haven’t cleaned up your vocabulary… although I did hear someone yesterday call someone a ‘pickle-dicked tree-licker’. I heard that on my way home from the ramen stand and thought of you. I know how you love to come up with new and interesting ways of giving people nicknames.”

Iruka bit his lip to keep from chuckling. Those are pretty good…I’ll have to remember to use them when Genma gives me shit. He composed himself and tuned back into what Kakashi was telling his dead teammate.

“At the risk of changing the subject again, I got asked to Kurenai and Asuma’s wedding. Ooo and guess what?” Pause. “Kurenai asked me to give her away. They are doing it western-style…or whatever that means.” Pause. “Yeah I thought that was neat too. Although there is one problem.” Another pause. “I can’t dance. Apparently at some point I have to dance with Kurenai. It’s tradition or something. The last time I tried to dance was when Rin tried to teach me how and I wound up crushing one of her feet on accident.” Kakashi’s head cocked over to the other side. “You remember don’t you Rin? You limped away screaming about how I was such a brilliant shinobi and yet you couldn’t figure out why I couldn’t dance worth a shit.”

Kakashi pushed himself up and sat cross-legged on the ground. “No, I don’t know how I’m going to handle the dancing problem, but I’ll figure something out, I always do.” Another pause and a sigh, “Obito, WHY are we going back to what happened last night? Iruka and I had a decent time. Well at least I think he had a decent time. I hope he did…I had fun…” Pause and a scowl, “I’ll make friends Obito…eventually…I’ll have more of a chance now that I’m going to be in the village for a little while. But I’m more worried about what I’m going to do with the kids…more especially Diago.” Another pause. “Yeah, he’s been the main culprit so far. I seriously think he was the one that rigged my desk. Which reminds me, I need to ask Tsunade if it’s ok for me to replace all of the furniture in the class room.” Another pause. “No Obito… I’m not being paranoid….”

Kakashi sighed and pushed himself up off the ground and stood in front of the memorial. Iruka noticed the change in his voice; it was back to its normal tone. “I have to go. I have class in a couple of hours and I need to be prepared. I believe a lesson in summons will be interesting…anyways, I’ll see you all again tomorrow morning.” His hands flashed through some seals and the disappeared in a puff of smoke.

Summons? Well at least today may not be so boring…especially if Kakashi and summons are involved…Iruka thought as he stepped out of the shadows of the trees and walked towards where Kakashi had been sitting. The grass where he was laying was firmly pushed into the ground, a testament to how long Kakashi had actually been sitting there. Iruka shook his head and focused on the stone in front of him.

“Mom, Dad…it’s me. I know I haven’t been here in a while, but… I’ve screwed up pretty well this time…”

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Kakashi watched in amusement from his henged form of a floor plant at the scene in front of him. Most of the children were huddled around his largest dog summon, trying to figure out what its purpose was for being for being there in their classroom.

“That dog is huge.”

“Is it even real?”

“Of course it’s real.”

“Whose dog is it?’

“Dunno…think it has a name?”

“If it doesn’t can we call it Killer?”

“It’s got to be someone’s…”

“Ooo no wait! Let’s call it Gravedigger!”

“Yeah! That sounds cooler!”

“It’s got really big ears.”

“I wonder if it drools?”

“Of course it drools, it’s a dog …duh…”

“What’s that thing it’s wearing?”

“It looks like a cape…maybe it’s a special dog!”

“What’s a special dog doing here in our classroom?”

“What’s that mark on his cape thingy?”

“It looks like a face…”

“It sure is ugly.”

“What’s ugly? The face on the cape or the dog?”

“Both,” Diago said as he stepped closer to the animal trying to inspect the cape around its neck. “It looks like it’s the owner’s insignia.”

“What’s an insignia?”

“Get a dictionary and look it up.” Diago said. “Not my fault if you can’t understand big words.”

“You don’t have to be a jerk Diago.” Akito said softly.

“Whatever Akito…” Diago shrugged the other boy’s comment. “So you think that sucky teacher left this thing here to teach us instead?”

Yokou was sitting at her desk looking over a scroll. “He’s not a sucky teacher Diago,” she said looking up from her studies, “and you should be more respectful.”

Diago smirked in her direction. “Aww what’s the matter? Got a crush on our sensei?” The statement made most of their other classmates laugh. Yokou’s face turned red and she buried her head back into her scroll.

Kenji pushed his way through the circle of kids surrounding the giant bulldog and came face to face with Diago. “She’s right…he’s not a sucky teacher…so shut it.”

“Yeah shut it.” Kouji echoed. He was standing behind Diago with the same look of defiance on his face that his brother was expressing.

“What’s wrong with you two?” Diago shouted at them. The twins didn’t move or back down. “Fine be that way, I’ll just take care of the both of you right here and now.” He rolled up his sleeves and took up a defensive stance. “He’s a sucky teacher because I SAY that he’s a sucky teacher and…”

“Would you shut up already? I’m trying to sleep here, and you little brats are annoying me.” The bulldog said as he stood up to his full height. Every kid in the room froze where they were and looked up at the massive dog.

“Uhhh...uhh…it talked…” Akito stammered out.

“Of course I can talk…so…since I can speak…why don’t you pups get back to your seats…” The dog took a deep breath and woofed as loud as he could. “NOW!”

Forty –five kids proceeded to scream in unison as the floor plant over in the corner began to shake violently. If anyone had noticed, they would have mistaken the plant’s shaking due to the dog trying to break the sound barrier with his bark. Actually, that was all Kakashi could do to keep him from laughing so hard and trying not to drop the henge.

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Iruka jumped up from his desk and ran to his door. From there he could see what was causing the commotion and he let out a small laugh. Well, at least school won’t be near as boring with him around…

He turned and went back to his desk, his kids looking at him in curiosity. “Get back to work! Shinobi must NOT break their concentration when doing an assignment!” The kids ‘meeped’ and went back to their studies. Iruka sat down at his desk and settled himself in for grading some more papers. It wasn’t too long that his thoughts traveled back to Kakashi.

I’ll check on him at lunch, maybe see if he needs any help with anymore lesson plans. Iruka smiled at a new idea. I’ll also offer to help him out with his ‘dancing problem’…It’s the least I can do. I can’t dance like a pro or anything, but I can help him not look like a complete idiot. Hmmm…I’ll have to bring the subject up in a stealthy way of course…

“Maaaaa, Iruka-sensei,” Kakashi scratched the back of his head while eyeing the chunnin, “are you sure this is type of weapons training is ….acceptable?”

“Hai, hai!” Iruka flashed him a toothy grin. “This gives the kids a chance to see what it’s really like out there in the field. And this is also considered on-the-job training as well.” Iruka answered cheerfully. Hmmm maybe too cheerfully, he thought to himself, I need to tone it down a bit if I want to pull this off.

“But isn’t the first field test after they become Genin is when they technically start their on-the-job training?” Kakashi asked, squinting back down at the lesson plan that Iruka was ‘helping’ him with.

Shit, think of something Umino…. Iruka furrowed his eyebrows at Kakashi. He gathered up his nerves and steeled himself for the debate. He knew Kakashi would have a different outlook on this type of teaching practices, but Iruka also knew that Kakashi, no matter how insane he truly was, was still a Kohona ninja underneath the mask that he wore. All the work involved with training and teaching the young ninjas were for the good of the village after all…..

“Kakashi-sensei, new generations of ninja are becoming stronger everyday. We must be strategic in planning out our lessons and begin instructing the children early in this type of weapons training to prepare them. In the case of a village-wide invasion, the children would be able to effectively perceive the enemy’s actions and tactics. All we are really teaching them to do right now is to distract the enemy enough to get away.” Iruka answered him is his best educated voice.

“Children and civilians are supposed to go to the shelter in the Hokage Monument, not compete with their elders in attaining and evading the enemy’s attention, not to mention that they would be making themselves a target or a bargaining tool if they were to be caught.” Kakashi said, as he looked up from his lesson plan. He studied the chunnin’s face for a moment before turning his attention to weapons cabinet that stood in the corner of the classroom. Children with weapons, hmmmm. I’m not quite sure I like the sound of that. Although I know they do start at an early age. Of course I graduated when I was six years old. I barely remember what all I was taught here at the academy…

“That is true Kakashi-sensei, but nonetheless, these are required survival techniques that are instructed here at the Kohona Ninja Academy. If for some reason that any of the children were to be separated from their families in a time of crisis, they should at the very least be prepared to evade the enemy. And throwing kunai and shuriken are techniques used to help slow down the enemy. They have to be properly schooled on the subject and be able to ‘hit’ a moving target.” Iruka turned away from Kakashi took a breath and grinned like a mad man. “Besides, how many ninja do you know from experience that will freely sit in one spot and LET shuriken and kunai be thrown in their direction?” Heh, we both know what that answer is. Wow, they are right when they say that he is a genius. But, on the other hand, geniuses don’t have enough sense to come in out of the rain. Iruka thought to himself. He was determined not to lose this battle of teaching ethics to Kakashi, as odd as that sounded. Besides, I heard that he graduated when he was six. He might have spent a total of 10 months here at the academy. And with all those jutsus bouncing about in his brain, the need for having memories from his childhood is practically non-existent. He has no clue on how we actually ‘teach’ the arts of throwing weaponry for the simple fact that he doesn’t remember. Iruka gave Kakashi a smug look. Heh, this is a game I can win, Hatake, prepared to be owned!

Kakashi gave Iruka a startled look. What he’s saying is very true. Hmm, well then it looks like I have no choice. Besides, Iruka-sensei has been teaching academy students for quite some time now. I practically have an expert telling me how and what to train my new pupils. Hehe, this isn’t going to be as bad as I thought after all. “That is excellent reasoning, but how exactly am I supposed to be able to teach them how to throw properly and be a moving target at the same time?” Kakashi asked.

“You have the Sharingan, Kakashi-sensei, and it’s not like you are going to have to be thinking of different jutsus to ward the children off. This isn’t that kind of training exercise. It’s just simple weapons, and besides, you’re actually better off teaching the children how to throw better than what I can,” Iruka gave Kakashi a small pout, complete with a lip-quiver, “I’m actually going to be jealous in watching you teach them… um …say….um…maybe you could help out my class a little too…”

“I don’t know Iruka-sensei; I already have 45 of my own to watch...”

“No no, I mean, I’ll help you with organizing the lessons and all, but my class could use an expert’s eye in watching their techniques.” Iruka knew he was laying it on thick, he just hoped he was building the other ninja’s ego enough to persuade him. “I’ll handle getting the kids together and making sure that they don’t cause any trouble, and you can do the actual teaching part. I’ll be there to help and give you any advice if you have to explain anything technical to the younger ones. This would be a good first experience with the kids and everyone will get off to a good start.” Kami, I should sell tickets to this….

“Well,” Kakashi tapped his cheek thoughtfully, “Since tomorrow is my first day and all, I really wouldn’t mind the help. And I’m honored to hear that you think my services here could help your class as well. I’d be delighted to share our classroom time together tomorrow.” Kakashi’s visible eye crinkled up in a smile. Yeah, and what other usefulness can I get out of you Iruka? This whole teaching thing cuts into my reading time, and I can’t go without my daily dose of erotica...

“Well then!” Iruka chirped, “Tomorrow we will have a high-quality practice. Make sure you are here at 8 a.m.!” Iruka was practically skipping toward the classroom door, “Oh, Kakashi-sensei, I know that you like to show up late to your..um..meetings,” Iruka knew all too well, he could write a script just from Naruto’s personal accounts of his former sensei’s tardiness. “Tsunade-sama would be highly upset if academy classes ran past their usual time just because a teacher decided to come to work late.”

Kakashi frowned. He hadn’t thought about this. This would definitely be different than teaching Genin. I’ll just get up earlier to go visit Obito. I may not be able to be late like I used to be, but I refuse to give up my time at the memorial.

“Maaa, you drive a hard bargain Iruka-sensei, but I’ll be here on time.” I’d also rather not piss off Tsunade any more than what she already is. But Iruka doesn’t need to know all that…

“Excellent! See you tomorrow then!” Iruka bounced out the door. He is quite an enthusiastic teacher, Kakashi said to himself as he watched the chunnin instructor leave, Maaa, he makes me tired just watching him. He looked down at his lesson plan. They had only discussed tomorrow’s activities. What would he do for the rest of the week? Of course, that’s what Iruka is for, heh the man is way too open and easy to manipulate. How he ever became a ninja is beyond m, he apparently has good communication and personnel skills to teach children, but nothing special though. Kakashi looked around the classroom, wishing he’d had gotten more out information out of the other ninja before letting him bounce out the door. See that’s another thing, ninjas do NOT bounce. Kakashi sighed. Maaa, I’m probably being too hard on him, he could be a great ninja for all I know. But what I have figured out so far is that he is way too trusting and helpful towards people he’s not that familiar with …now…..where was I…. Kakashi pulled back out his Icha Icha book and opened it to a dog-eared page. He propped his feet up on the desk and settled in for some light, X-rated reading. Iruka is going to handle the kids while I do a little lecture on weapons, …hrmph… teaching is too easy…..

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I can’t believe I fucking pulled that off! Iruka was busy hurtling across rooftops at speeds only attainable by elite jounin. Perhaps it was the adrenaline boost that he had as soon as he heard Kakashi agree to their ‘joint classroom experience’, or maybe it was the excited thought of seventy kids throwing sharp objects at Kakashi’s appendages. It didn’t matter, Iruka’s brain was overloading with numerous thoughts about the entire situation. I’m not keeping this a secret. He humiliated me in front of the other ninja; it’s only polite that I return the favor. The thought of having a full scale audience at Kakashi’s pin-cushion party gave Iruka another spike of adrenaline. He changed his direction and started heading towards the Hokage tower. I know it’s my day off from the mission room, but there’s no rule that says I can’t stop by and chat with a few of my fellow comrades.

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“Iruka!” Izumo looked up from his pile of paperwork. “What are you doing here? You usually don’t come within a 200 foot radius of the tower on your days off.”

“I know, buuuuuuut I thought you might be able to help a fellow coworker out.”

“Sure!” Izumo waved his hand in front of Kotetsu’s face. “Hey, pay attention; I might need your help.”

“With what?” Kotetsu pushed Izumo’s had away from his face. “What’s going on Iruka? Why do you look all…pukey” Kotetsu paused, waiting for a rebuttal from Iruka. Didn’t Genma come through here earlier with that same weird look? I hope it’s not a virus….

Iruka brushed off the comment. “Come here, I got some interesting information.” Kotetsu and Izumo leaned in.

Their huddle was quickly broken up by Anko. She noticed the trio and noticed even further that Iruka was in the mission room….on his day off. That was sacrilegious. So she had a reason to come over and put her favorite chunnin in a headlock. “Iruka-kun! What gossip do you have for me? I know you have gossip for me…otherwise you’d be miles from here,” Anko put a little more of a squeeze in her grip “Right, Iruka-kun?”

“Hai,” Iruka squeaked out, “But if you knock me out then I won’t be able to tell you, and trust me, this gossip is good.” Anko dropped the hold and Iruka took a few moments to get his vision straight. That woman and her death-grip are too dangerous together, heh, well at least she is hearing this from me, or she would be tracking me down later asking for verification. And Anko is practically known for being the town crier; I wonder how many people she can tell in 14 hours….

Iruka smiled at Anko. “You’re not gonna believe it if I told you…”

“Try me Iruka-kun, I’m bored and I need some excitement.”

“Think you can be at the academy training field at 7:30 in the morning?”

“Jaa, I can,” Anko raised her eyebrow at Iruka, “But the question is…WHY would I want to be there?”

“Well, let me tell you……”

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Kakashi finally wandered out of the school room sometime after dark. As he made his way home, he pondered about tomorrow’s activities. He needed to know his students at some point, but was unsure about asking about their personal lives. He also wanted to know if any of them possessed a bloodline trait. Not that he would exploit it or anything, he would just be aware of it. Expect the unexpected and look underneath the underneath. Granted they are but just mere children, I know that there has to be a reason why this was made into a mission and not taken as a volunteer job. The kids might be troublesome…and I don’t like the way that desk smelled……Bah I’ll just ask Iruka on how to get to know them. He’ll probably be more than happy to tell me…..

“Don’t look at me like that…”

“I’m sorry, but considering the circumstances, this just happens to be the only facial expression I can muster up at the moment.”

Tsunade sighed and put her head in her hands. “Listen, I have no one left to do this. This is normally an assignment that I would leave for a chunnin, but they are all out on missions. All the other jounin are out on A class and S class missions…”

Where I belong, Hatake Kakashi thought to himself. This is such bullshit.

“Knock off your sulking brat.” Tusnade glared at him.

“I do not sulk. I choose to brood instead. And furthermore, if you are going to imply that I am acting like a child please make sure that you at least identify my childish actions correctly,” Kakashi spat out glaring back at his superior.

Tsunade looked up from her paperwork and shot him a look that spoke volumes. It was a cross between “What the Fuck Did You Just Say to Me” and an “I’m Going to Have Sakura Practice Her Vasectomy Medical Training on You” type of look. Kakashi quickly straightened out from his trademark lazy slouch and prepared himself for the outburst he was fixing to receive.

“Hatake, I do NOT have time for this. This IS you mission and you are GOING to accept it soldier!”

Hmmmm…maybe this won’t be as bad as I am making it out to be, let’s just see exactly what this dammed mission entails… “Fine.” He snatched the scroll off of her desk and read over the information and names. “Kami, there has to be over 40 names on here….”

“I know. The number of them was unusually large this year. The academy needs help.”

She must be joking….or she’s sober. She can’t expect me to go through with this, I lack morals…“Listen,” Kakashi decided that the truthful way may be the best approach in this case, “I’ll admit, even I don’t have the patience for this Tsunade-sama. There MUST be someone else…” Kakashi looked up from his scroll to find a fuming Hokage glaring chakra-coated daggers at him. Ooooook, that option didn’t work…and maybe this really isn’t the time to be arguing…

“Get. Your. Sorry. Ass. In. Gear. And. Prepare. For. Your. Classes. Ka-ka-shi!” Tusname seethed through her already clenched teeth.

“Hai,Tsunade-sama.”. With a quick pop and a puff of smoke, the copy-ninja teleported outside the Hokage Tower.

Tsunade grabbed two bottles of sake from underneath her desk. I should have given one of these to Hatake. She smiled inwardly at the thought. He’s gonna need it if he plans on surviving the first week of school. Maybe I shouldn’t have assigned him the 5 and 6 year olds, bah, he can handle it. If not, it will be worthwhile to watch him quiver under the eyes of a bunch of 1st year academy students. She took a thoughtful sip. Genma, you dirty dog, this is one bet that you are definitely going to lose.

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Genma was smothering a giggle from his hiding place in the ceiling. Oh man Hatake… you have no clue what you are in for. Even I can only handle those brats for just a few days. Thank the gods I’m only a sub……hmmm…. Genma cracked a bigger smile as an interesting thought crossed his mind. Hehehe, I think I should give a couple of people a head’s up about Hatake coming and hanging out at the Academy for awhile. It’s not like this is a classified mission or anything, so “technicially” I’m not doing anything un-shinobi-like by letting them in on his little “mission”……Genma’s eyes widened, his brain almost locking up on the (in his opinion) hilarious details of the situation, and thought about one person in particular who would find this piece of information even more amusing than he was.

Iruka……You’re gonna wet yourself from laughing so hard……

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Kakashi looked at the list again. Forty-five students. Shit, I couldn’t keep up with three, much less this many. Kakashi frowned at this thought, recalling the days when he had Team 7 under his tutelage. Even though his team members had gone separate ways, things were easier then. Those students came to him already knowledgeable in the different areas of being a shinobi. With these academy students he would have to start from scratch. Kakashi sighed as he put away the scroll he was using for his current reading material to replace it with his Icha Icha novel. He turned towards the path leading to the Academy and began to make his way towards what he felt was his everlasting doom. They want me to teach mini-nin. There’s no way I’m going to do this. I mean…it’s not that I can’t or anything…it’s just that I’m Hatake Kakashi for kami’s sake! Sharingan Kakashi! The infamous One-Eyed Copy Nin! I didn’t spend all my years being a ninja to wind up a stuffy academy teacher. I have better things to attend to ... like…ummm… reading porn. Kakashi nodded his head in agreement with his inner thoughts.

Alright genius, time to think of a way out of this. There has got to be a way…

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“Alright class, bring your kunai tomorrow. We will be spending the entire day discussing and practicing tactical throwing techniques as well as learning how to formulate your enemy’s kunai trajectory paths.” Groans and looks of despair came from all corners of the classroom. Okay, maybe that was going over the top a little. Iruka sighed inwardly.

Hmm, I guess I’m going to have to liven things up a bit.

“I’ll bring a live, MOVING, target to practice with…”

The classroom bellowed a large “WHOOP!” before tearing out of the classroom door while chattering to one another about tactics and who would be able to draw “first blood”. Iruka sighed again, wondering where he went wrong in teaching the children kunai throwing techniques. He also felt sorry for the person who going to be making a guest appearance in his classroom tomorrow. “Shit, who in the hell am I going to talk into being a moving target for a bunch of 8 and 9 year olds who are just getting the hang of throwing weaponry?” Actually ‘flinging weaponry’ would be better words for what the kids were doing, but a few were progressing along nicely and he had to give them credit.

He turned his attention to the stack of scrolls that were lying on his desk begging to be graded. I wish I hadn’t made them do an essay on the theory behind genjitsus, although, it be interesting to read what they have to say about them. Iruka sighed for a third time in 10 minutes. I really need a genjitsu to fall on me right about now; I wouldn’t mind the hallucination…

A familiar chakra flare was coming from the hallway. Iruka looked up in time to see Genma strolling into his classroom with a peculiar look on his face. Iruka thought he looked like he had been throwing up and laughing at the same time. Hmmm. Genma. With an expression that screams “Tickle me and I’ll hurl on your sandals”. Nice. This should be interesting…

“Guess who’s coming to pay our fine academy a prolonged visit?” Genma squeaked out, obviously trying to control his laughter…or puke. Iruka cautiously placed the trash can in between them just in case Genma couldn’t contain himself. He also started to draw a mental map on what furniture was where in his classroom. He didn’t want a desk or a bench to be in the way of his escape route if Genma’s vomit was going to take on projectile forms of spewage.

“Um, I don’t know? Are you ok Genma-san? You look kind of…pukey…”

“Just guess.”

“Will you not throw up on me if I guess correctly?”

Genma looked at him quizzically. “Erm…why would I throw up on you?”

“No reason…heh…soooooooo who’s visiting the academy?”

“Well, they have found Taki-san a replacement.”

“Ahh,” Taki had been gone for two months now. Iruka knew that occasionally academy teachers were sent on missions every now and then, but for a teacher to be gone for two months was usually not a good sign. “Tsunade-sama has given up hope on seeing him return?”

“I don’t think she ever gives up, but I think she is trying to be rational in this situation.”

That’s a first. She must have finally sobered up. Or Shizuine henged into the Hokage and started doing her work for her. Iruka felt a smile come across his face. Either way…at least they are trying to help the situation instead of continually finding substitutes for the poor kids. They have been though 14 subs already….not that it’s entirely the childrens fault or anything…ok well maybe they are a small part of the reason why the subs are choosing to leave...

There was this one time at recess when an exploding tag laced with stink bomb fluid went off inside the teacher’s desk…..

Who was he kidding….this group of first year academy students made Naruto look like an angel. Boy, I don’t envy the teacher that winds up with them. In fact, I don’t think that there’s anyone willing enough to volunteer for this position. Oh gawd..unless…Tsunade wouldn’t have…. Iruka’s train of thought broke from the sounds of something tapping. He looked up and found Genma looking quite put out.

“Are you gonna guess or not?” Genma tapped his foot impatiently at the chunnin. Iruka snapped his attention back to the senbon-chewing jounin.

“Sorry, I was supposed to be guessing…right….erm…Ebisu?”

“Nope, try someone more…flashy.”

“Gai-sensei?!?! Please tell me you’re kidding…” Iruka wasn’t sure if he could handle working so close to Kohona’s Green Beast. He could only handle so much sparkling and spandex.

“No, besides he’s out on a mission at the moment, although THAT would be almost as interesting to watch. Hmmm, maybe flashy isn’t the right word. How about….crazy?”

Thanks a lot Genma, which only leaves me with ALL of the jounins to pick from. Being crazy is a freaking requirement to even BE a jounin. Hmmm maybe he means the craziest. He could only think of one right off the top of his head.

“Anko?”

“Anko…with small children….I don’t think so.” Genma scratched the back of his head. “Ok, lemme think of another word to describe this person….eh…anti-role-model-ish?” Genma looked at Iruka, hoping that maybe that would be enough this time.

“Personally, I wouldn’t recommend a jounin to be a candidate for a role model….but that’s my thoughts.” Iruka tapped his finger to his forehead, trying to place a specific person to those adjectives that Genma was supplying. “Asuma …maybe…he smokes in front of kids…”

“Oh come on Iruka!” Genma shook his head in disbelief. This chunnin could be just so dense sometimes. “Fine! This will give it away…this person is weird…as in “reads porn in public” type of weird!” Kami, if he can’t correctly guess this time…

Iruka eyes widened in shock, or fear, or just general awe. Needless to say, he was going through many emotions…maybe if he just started alphabetically from appalled to zoinked, he could cover them all…..

Heh nevermind….it finally clicked. Genma’s face contorted back to the pukey-grin.

No wonder he’s smiling like that. Iruka though, his feet frozen to where they were…he was still in shock. No way. No fucking WAY. They are against Anko teaching. But they are letting Hatake…. Iruka just moved his mouth up and down, trying to convey his present feelings toward Hatake Kakashi with small innocent children. Ok, maybe not totally innocent, but still. Wait…. Iruka finally closed his mouth and smiled…evilly. He hadn’t forgotten about the time before the chunnin exams where Kakashi had made him look foolish in front of everyone, including the Third Hokage. Iruka honestly felt that his students were not ready, and Kakashi made him feel smaller than a blade of grass with his cutting remarks and his look of indifference. It was almost like he didn’t care what happened to his team, and it infuriated Iruka to no end. This isn’t the chunnin exams, and I think it’s time I got a little retribution. Besides…..this is going to make for some serious entertainment.

“Hmmm so our illustrious Copy-Nin is going to grace us with his presence neh? We should make him feel right at home.” Iruka dropped his evil grin and replaced it with a simple serene smile. Genma felt his stomach roll. He knew Iruka and how much Kakashi’s words had bothered him after the chunnin exams. He almost felt sorry for Kakashi….almost….

“So, how are you plot….err …planning to welcome him” Genma asked in a casual tone.

Iruka smiled and was fixing to respond when his classroom door opened. A man with unruly gray hair stepped just inside the door frame. He put his hand on the back of his head and gave a questioning look (well what looked like a questioning look…it was difficult to read though the mask that he wore) towards the two ninjas that stood in front of him.

“Yo. Umm could someone tell me which room is 213? I’m here to replace Taki-san.”

Iruka smiled innocently at the man standing in the doorway. “Of course Kakashi-san, room 213 is just right behind you across the hall.”

“Thanks.” Kakashi turned and stepped across the hallway.

You just wait Kakashi, I’m gonna love watching you squirm in front of those kids, ooooh and said kids…. which by the way….. need shuriken practice…

“Hey Kakashi-san, did you need help with your lesson plan for tomorrow?” Iruka asked, and then proceeded to follow Kakashi to his classroom, “Cause if you’re stuck, I’d be more than happy to help you start planning!” he quipped.

Genma looked at Iruka with an incredulous look on his face and muttered under his breath “Wow, not wasting any time are we, sensei?”

Well, it happened. I finally got my interview. I already know (or I have convinced myself ) that I'm really not getting it.

Although, my interview went quite well...too well. The plant manager said I confused him. Of course, when he said this I was internally panicking, but I kept myself calm and looked like I was in control and he explained himself. He said that he had an idea of what he wanted in a supervisor and I think he had someone already picked out. Then I came along and jacked up his entire way of thinking. Now, he said he was thoroughly confused because he doesn't know now what he wants.

That's one hell of a compliment.

Maybe I should have sabotaged my own interview.....

I have a REALLY bad track record of acting on impulses (in this case....applying for a supervisor's position), and then thinking about the consequences (if I do get this position, I will virtually have no social life, amongst other work related issues), then deciding that maybe it wasn't a good idea for me to act on those impulses.

Before the interview, I had it in my head that there was just no way that I was even going to be considered for this position. I knew, however, that I had to make management take me seriously because later on I do want to be promoted, and so I went to that interview with the full intention of showing them who I was and what I was capable of. 

I brought my 'game' to the interview and owned that office for 30 minutes.

Maybe I shouldn't have treated this like I was at the fucking Superbowl.

Because now...heh...I'm having this bad feeling that I might have made the final cut.....

I just might get it all.....and then some I don't want.